Unbleached and All Purpose

Wow. This is adorable :)

2008-11-18T11:59:00.001-08:00

a sad, sad world

2005-08-09T14:56:00.000-07:00

What is it about money that makes people think that when they have a lot of it they're better than those without? Because they can afford to buy expensive things and because of those expensive things, shiney-on-the-outside-but-empty-on-the-inside people begin to pay attention to them? They become friends that are more expensive than the most priceless work of art because they take not green papers, not gold or diamonds but things that are beyond value. Like breath or the sense to enjoy it.

They take first your personality. They make you a carbon copy of something as nasty as cigarette smoke and old, blanched paper and a grey sky that enver ends.

Then they block off your heart from the rest of your body. With it locked away they take the capacity to feel emotions such as love, anger, humility.

Without your heart and personality you have no foundation on which to rest morals and ethics, so you have no opinions other than the ones they feed you.

With all this done they have stolen your soul and therefore your connection to other human beings.

So go ahead with your yachts and your Maseratis and your tiny dogs with crystal collars and the constant vague question that you might throw out there about why you must have it all. But then again, *they* have everything and you are one of *them* so you must have it all as well.

Go ahead with all the money in the world. Your condescension towards me is ironic, for what you see as substance I see as an empty cave for an empty shell to rattle around in until it's time to crack, produce nothing and feed the Earth your brittle remains so that it may make beautiful things from a life so void of such.

Fuck you in a tie (heavy curses abound)!

2005-07-06T10:52:00.000-07:00

[angry post]

This is to all the ignorant asses out there that think a woman wearing a tie has to 'mean' something.

Fuck you once. Fuck you twice.

I don't know which one says 'fuck you!' more, so pick the one that pisses you off the most.

Even Mrs OCD. "But what does it 'mean'?"

How about it means I like wearing ties because it's a neat and distinguished look that not just guys should have.

And fuck you for assuming that I'm "a dike" and DOUBLE-FUCK YOU for thinking being gay is a bad thing and thinking all lesbians are "bulldikes" and fuck you for being anti-bulldikes. Just fuck you up a wall with a chainsaw. Suck on that, Mr. Anger Management.

You cannot assume something about a person because of something they are wearing, be it *anything*. Goths do not necessarily drown babies and spill goats blood, people in Metallica t-shirts are not necessarily angry people that want to 'Kill Em All', people from Wisconsin do not necessarily like cheese, and women in ties do not necessarily have penis envy.

How about while you're staring at me and thinking I like to have sex with women I'm staring at your nose and thinking you *LOVE* to drink yourself in to a stupor every night. Because I ain't got a sticker on my shirt that says 'I like eating bush' but you sure got a sign on your fucking nose saying 'I'm an alchy, world!'

Stop assuming. Talk to people. Learn about them. Stop being such fuck-cunts.

[/angry post]

fortune cookie #1

2005-04-20T08:52:00.000-07:00

"Cold feet are warm in the sunlight."

'eghad, i did it again' or 'another poem'

2005-03-20T08:58:00.000-08:00

Another one.

Practiced Saint

I see you smile; hands shake yours
i don't want this, cringing inside
to let you know how i truly feel
would slice your ego in three

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

i me see the inside you
the part you try to hide
i might do the unproud things
but at least my curtains are sheered

the little red bump
lets you know where i've been
and the white skirt tents
it's sequins are condemed

does that mean it's right to joke
does that make it okay to hate
to jeer and point and stab and scream
it's just another inside you like

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

the paperclips are missing
my stapler's gone too
are you trying to put it together now
you need all the help you can get

i'm stablized
in a world of rocking motions
your ignorant eyes
glint with st elmo's fire

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

i'll let you see my anger
all my lack of hate
you're not the worst out there
your just the worst inside

notes from the workplace

2005-03-16T13:09:00.000-08:00

Babies
Her clothes frighten me. Like those of Christina Applegate, but older and tackier and maybe not the clothes of Christina Applegate herself but the babies of Christina Applegate's clothes and a muumuu.

The Importance of a Greeting
Black, hard, beady little eyes stare at me, drill holes into the back of my neck. He's either on crack or just didn't take his allergy medicine this morning because he's wirey, frenetic, irritable and his eyes are passed bloodshot. Next time I'll say 'good morning' before I ask him a question.

Never take two Cool Mint Icebreakers at once
Breath fresheners should lighten and brighten your breath. They should not numb your tongue, mouth and throat. I wanted a mint, not chloraseptic.

Typos
(See if you can spot it)
War Memorial Auditorium
8000+ Business Execs
40+ Caterers
300+ Exhibitionists
(time for a new copy editor)

Snowbird
Her hair is a dull orange with the shine and curl of a clown's wig. Her Florida address (she can't be bothered to remember it) is written on the inside of her purse in big, bold letters. Neighboring this information is her phone number and "the password I always use for everything".

Need I comment? Really?

brought to you by the letter...

2005-03-05T08:01:00.000-08:00

Seasame Street is their drug lab/whorehouse and sometimes I think they are trying to kill me.

The letter "e" with his endearing smile.

The capitalized "A" with her snear and razor-sharp head.

The way a "z" zigs out of the way just in time.

A the "j"s smirk drop.

They'll stab you right in the back they will. And don't get me started on "Q" and it's incognito lower case.

The ones with the polka dots and the stripes... The ones that think they're animals.... The ones that watch you with creepy little eyes...

I shudder with fear that I will never sleep again.

that damnable froggy. i prefer turtles

2005-02-26T10:04:00.000-08:00

I swear to the ever holy Mahoney that the frog I didn’t see is following me. I thought I just saw him by my foot and it scare the D&D Latte right from wherever it was swimming to my bladder. But now I am afraid to go into the bathroom because it might be back in there. It hides under the veil of shadows but I know he’s real.

I’ll call him Frobe. I don’t know why. Holycrap. I am losing it.

overhear the strangest things

2005-02-17T22:08:00.000-08:00

This really isn't one of them, but I overheard this today at work and I thought it was blog-worthy.

Lady I Work With: "Wow. There are lots of hang-ups today."

Man I Work With: "You mean the people calling? They're just calling and hanging up?"

Lady I Work With: "Yeah. Must be, like, hang-up day."

Me: *palms face*

other little bit

Another Lady I Work With: "Why is it every night after the 7:00 wave I come out to use the restroom and [the janitors] are always cleaning it?"

My Thoughts: ......I am not going there......I am not going there......It's not like jobs use *schedules* or anything, right?

question of cleanliness

2005-02-10T09:53:00.000-08:00

How clean is your life? Would you eat off it?

sales

2005-02-09T21:19:00.000-08:00

I have been wondering... If you could bottle the female orgasm (not just any orgasm, but the FEMALE orgasm) and sell it to men and women, would it out-sell Beanie Babies?

2005-01-26T18:53:00.000-08:00

ok, so i am dinking some vodka (sky) because my bf suggested i drink A little because people at work (god damn you) asked me to be there on a day off I asked for In novEMber.

hahahHA they won't ask me to wokr on a day off AGAiN!~! at least not whan i come in with a hangover. hahahah.

anyway, I dounf this funny:

Too Funny

Okay, this stuff was too funny, to me anyway. So, I know many people won't get half this stuff, but if you do understand any of it, post it in your journal too!

- If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Minnesota.

- If you're proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Minnesota.

- If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy", you might live in Minnesota.

- If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Minnesota.

- If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Minnesota.

- If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Minnesota.

- If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Minnesota.

- If you know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedi, Edina and Shakopee, you might live in Minnesota.

- If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in Minnesota.

- "Vacation" means going up north past Brainerd for the weekend.

- You measure distance in hours.

- You know several people who have hit deer more than once.

- You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.

- You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

- You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.

- You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

- You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.

- You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

- There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time.

- You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

- Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

- You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

- You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

- You consider Minneapolis exotic.

- Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

- Down South to you means Iowa.

- A brat is something you eat.

- You go out to a fish fry every Friday.

- You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."

yeah., laugh or don't. i am enjoying my clean blue YUKCY csky!

bye,

That was exactly what I wanted.

2005-01-26T11:20:00.000-08:00

After all, what young Florida woman doesn't want her shampoo to freeze into semi-solid chunks in the morning and the hard candy she left out to melt at noon?!?

Florida pisses me off.

teh gym, teh run... away that is

2005-01-25T07:17:00.000-08:00

THE GYM appears in your horizon. Big and scary bold letters because it is THE GYM. You have your bag with you, your water, your book, your MP3 player and your keys that you are so NOT going to lock in the locker and have to have the big butch lady with the lock-cutters come in and kill your pretty $10 pink lock.

Pink is not you anyway. It's Lana. Now the cutting is funny, but still it's $10 down the drain almost instantly and next time you'll get the yellow and orange one that was out of stock.

Anyway, you are crossing the parking lot where you parked far away from the entrance. You tell yourself that it's because you are not yet proficent at parking, but you know that's not it as you do fine at work. It's because you want time to be able to back out of it before those glass doors close in on you and you're trapped until you do at the very least 20 minutes of cardio.

So you're corssing the lot, determined ahead and all these things cross your mind.

BAD: The cute guy at the front desk will look at you and wonder why the chubby girl is even bothering. And why is she dressed like that?
Good: If you keep coming here you won't be chubby.
BAD: The feeling of intimidation that serious every-day-of-the-week gymbirds give you.
Good: You'll be hot enough to move on to muscle building someday soon.
BAD: The fact that it's always packed when you are able to go because there are more people that will see you.
Good: The fact that it's always packed when you are able to go because there are more people so you are harder to pick out.
BAD: Thin people. They are your arch enimies.
Good: Thin people. They are your inspiration. They WILL be you brethren.
BAD: The fact that your MP3 player's battery dies just as you were beginning to forget the outside world and since you had your MP3 player and were going to run you didn't think you needed your book which is literally as far away as it could get still being in the building and not dumped in the pool and by the way, all the treadmills are either used, broken or buggered up with 'neccesary gym fat guy' sweat so now you are on one of those ski-tread things and you tell yourself that it's fine, you burn more calories, but really you wanted to run because running is pushing yourself. It's all about endurance and run-on sentences.
Good: Making goals.
BAD: Making your goals smaller halfway through the exercise.
Good: Finishing.
BAD: Feeling like everyone else thinks you are a wimp because you finished first.
Good: You feel strong.
BAD: You sit down to stretch and see that the chick behind you would be able to stick her tongue up her butt if she were so inclined, meaning that you are stiff and short and fat.
Good: Not caring because you feel proud of yourself.
BAD: Locker rooms.
Good: Leaving the locker room.
Good: Leaving the gym.
Good: Leaving the parking lot.
Good: Investing in your body on a regular basis makes you a healthier person that is more alert to what you are putting in your body and mouth. You want to protect the work you have done and are less likely to binge.

So, anywho. Just another day at the gym. Goddamn MP3 player.

Um, yeah. Rar, rar.

2005-01-21T08:22:00.000-08:00

I wrote this last night on my live journal. I was a little grumpy.

I am THE RECEPTIONIST!!

NOT THE SECOND COMING!!

I know all you peeps on the phone, all you members think you are special and that I, The Jesus Christ Superstar of all Receptionism, love you more than any other member, but fuck all! IF SOMEONE IS BUSY OR ON THE LINE, I CAN ONLY TRANSFER YOU THEIR FUCKING VOICEMAIL. I cannot magically:

a) make a duplicate of them so that you can speak to them
b) make them hang up and talk only to you when you call and pretend the hundreds of members and who knows how many consolidators just plain don't fucking exist.
or
c) pull a brand new travel agent out of my ass.

I hate you all. Go send your prayers elsewhere, I am sorry, this deity is out to fucking lunch.

Thank you,
Jesus the Receptionist

geoff shakes it like a Polaroid picture

2005-01-06T05:33:00.000-08:00

So now I have to start taking the bus. That is unless I buy a moped this Friday. I hope I do, bacause you just know I can't wait to have absolutely nothing between me and the open road, me and those wonderful, thoughtful, careful Florida drivers. I can't wait to get on my 49CC bike and strap an inch-thick plastic guard around my noggin and put my life in the hands of others more so than when I ride in a car.

I was taught no money skills and that I would have to wait to learn to drive. So I'm a spaz at both and am learning the hard way which is probably best. With money, not driving. Ha.

I got my license at, what? 20? No, I think it was 21. And now I am working while my guy goes to school, so even if I had the mad money skilz, I couldn't pay for insurance. No bling for me.

A moped it is then. And let me just say, it was good knowing you all. I am going to die.

And when you capitalize a letter you say "capitalize". So why did she tell me to 'graduate' the N? Arg.

my toilet broke

2005-01-04T18:30:00.000-08:00

Does anyone else think it's funny that I woke up to three inches of water on my bedroom floor New Year's Day? I thought it sort of set the tone for the new year. Not a bad tone as our house is now clean, but... more like a 'this year is going to be exciting and good for you, even if it's hectic, no fun and has you wearing highwaters' kind of tone.

At least it wasn't sewage. That would have been an entirely different kind of tone.

now there's sentiment i didn't think i would ever have to express

2004-12-15T08:32:00.001-08:00

"Fred!" (Fred is my almost-4 year old basset hound) "Don't eat the tampon!"

But then again you wouldn't expect me to have to tell him not to eat the Styrofoam or the plastic bags either. Yeah, he’s a dumbass.

And, btw, Stevie Wonder singing 'Ave Maria'... Yeah, bizarre.

Without you here, there is less to say.
I don't want you thinking I'm unhappy.
What is closer to the truth?
But if I live to a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you.

the parrot bay rum; you can taste the coconut

2004-12-14T15:44:00.000-08:00

I woke up to a hangover today without the fun part of actually drinking last night. So I am thinking I might be the hostage of some disease and what's sad is this won't even get me out of work because there's no one to replace me.

I am dead on my feet, dizzy and my mouth tastes like Pee Wee Herman's brain on wet toast. Blech. No matter how many Altoids I crunch on down, I feel like the next person I talk to is going to leave with their hair singed and their nostrils burning.

If you leave a tuna salad out on a wooden table three miles from home while a woman you don't know yells at you about her birthday in spanish and you think you have the right to buy your girl best friend panties for Christmas but you're worried about what your boyfriend and her mother will think of you if you do, what color is the sky you rode to work on?

I should have a little captain in me. I'd at least have an excuse.

for sale: one soul, used & beaten. will trade for new Nikon of equal value.

2004-12-14T03:20:00.000-08:00

Ever think about how very dumb the name Christmas is? It's like Harrymas. Bettymas. Mattmas, Beckymas, Jeffmas, Stanleymas. Thomasmas. Heh.

The lady over at the Dunkin Donuts from across the street knows me so well that when I was short the $5 I didn't have in my purse that I thought I did, she told me I could pay her back tomorrow. I don't know if that's cool on her account or just pathetic on mine.

I want to be in New Jersey right now. I hate Florida. I want to be able to drive for 40 minutes and be in Philly and take pictures every weekend.

Philly is like a photographer's dream in a way. Such diversity in all things, people, architecture, additudes.

The Ben Franklin Hotel (or whatever it is called; damn, I need a book on that whole city) is amazing on the inside. Just incredible. And the ballroom is astounding.

Is it wrong that I am thinking of ebaying/hawking everything I might get for X-Mas so that I can buy a really, really nice camera? I saw a couple at Best Buy that were decent. Hmmm... My dog is AKC certified. It's a shame they neutered him. He'd be worth more with the balls.

never, ever, ever jerk off in the same napkin twice

2004-12-11T21:09:00.000-08:00

-and other great tidbits from my lovely brother. That's right folks!! Free admission Dec 25th thru Jan 3rd!! My place. BYOB.

You don't even want to know the rest of the story. That poor carpet.

frosty doesn't stand a chance, but let the snowy bastard try his luck

2004-12-10T13:53:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's SEASON'S GREETINGS time from the state where even the fake snowmen melt:

So, here are some lovely pictures.

Can't tell what those are? Well, here's a close up:

They are little Santas with blue mitts that light up at night.

Hmmm... Asahi says he has decided that they must be old because not everyone has them. This of course means Walgreen's doesn't have them on FUCKING SALE. Why does Asahi know this? BECAUSE IF THEY DID HAVE THEM ON SALE EVERYONE AND HIS AUNT'S LEFT TITTIE WOULD HAVE THEM. LIKE THE SNOWMEN AND THE GRINCH'S AND THE FUCKING POOH-BEARS THAT ADORN EVERY FUCKING GODDAMN LAWN.

Eh-hem. Asahi would like to take a second to say 'Sorry'. He just hates Walgreen's and all these people that think they are the only one to buy these things then they take them home to realize that, nope, EVERYONE OF THEIR NEIGHBORS HAS ONE!!!

It's like 'ugly' in multiple.

Also, Asahi says note the lack of snow.

Here's a lovely shot:

Now, believe it or not folks, there's no actual wind in this shot. The palm tree just look like they are swaying in the wind thanks to all the hurricanes that raped us this season. But it makes for a nice postcard, no?

HOHOHO.

Yes, that's my Christmas. 94 degrees on a cool day, old farts that are even nastier now that the season of giving and sharing and love has come around, and palm trees.

I hate the palm trees. I want to move.

But of course it will be cold in late January and early February when nobody wants their titties to freeze. Of course, cold to the Floridians is 65 degrees. That is when everyone starts bitching and whining, "oh my god, it's freezing, I moved to Florida to get away from this weather."

Well, move to Mexico. I heard there are vacancies, folks there are leaving for the US, you know. And if you find any children in those quarter-fetch-it machines, I'll put them up. Special bond, you understand.

Asahi says "the price is right"

2004-12-10T08:32:00.000-08:00

Just got cable but I think the cable guy stole the clicker. I was stuck on family feud but now it's Bob Barker. The showcase chicks on this show look like Barbie dolls. I'm sure that's the point, but damn. I wonder how much they get paid.

"I don't hate anybody in this world, but I really don't like Peter Jennings."

Hmmm... Out of everyone in the world you can choose to almost hate... Who the hell would pick Peter Jennings? I mean out of all the people in the world that could place into your tiny little beating heart the rage of an animal... Peter Jennings?

Good Loisha.

I don't hate, I disassociate.

Monkey flubber with the ex-lax button and your mother talking about sex over AIM. That's no good.

captain my captain

2004-12-09T20:05:00.000-08:00

Oh, how I love you Mista Morgan. And it's Thursday, our date night. You're one yummy bitch with a little Mountain Dew to disguise your strong opinions.

http://www.davesdaily.com/pictures/120-getmeout.htm

I think that's how my mother found me. In some dingy by the wayside Mexican restaurant where the machines barely even take the quarters anymore and the cockroaches are just part of the ambiance. I think she doesn't doesn't want to tell me that I am an orphan, a random victim of the meaningless grime crimes that run rampant in Guatamala. Those god damned nuns.

How I got to Mexico, I'll never know. I suppose I hitched a ride with those midnight trucking faeries. Maybe some decent drunkard thought I was the worm at the bottom of the bottle. All I know is the next thing that poor family owned and operated restuarant knows is there is a little white orphaned child from Guatamala sitting inside their toy machine.

I'm sure at first they were going to take me out but then, hey, you know how it goes. What would Jesus do, right? So they left me in there while all the Mexicans around tried to get me out with their quarters.

So I dreamed that Frau Far Bissina, my horribly balanced and atrociously adorable hamster, had the voice of the woman travel agent at work. Imagine the Hollywood agents circa 1950 with the gravelly voice that dealt mainly with porn stars or little people. Or both.

Either way she was telling me not to eat all the cheese because the penguin in the ice box wanted some.

bare on the cross

2004-12-09T08:57:00.000-08:00

...lost again, dead in her refelction...

...flying in that Cesna, with Glenn Miller and that picture of my girl, I'm like some kind of sky-riding cowboy or fallen angel with his crooked halo for a bracelet...

fucktard

2004-12-08T22:28:00.000-08:00

KFC

me: "I'd like a number two."

@$#%!: "Crispy or original."

me: "Crispy."

@$#%!: "Ok, well, we only have original right now."

me: "Fine. Then I'll take that."

@$#%!: "So, you want original?"

Sigh.

No, actually I *want* crispy but apparently I'm not getting crispy so I'll live with original. As the comedian (I have forgotten his name for the moment) says to the idiots, "here's your sign".

The funny thing is this was a rare pure-bred idiot, not just an unlucky sap with an involentary mind spasm. Like my spelling of "involuntary" just now. I really have enough of those (mind-spasms) a day.

@$#%! was still offering crispy to the people behind us. I heard her. With two more customers (the funny thing with KFC; fast food to them is 10 minutes in the drivethru).

Here's a few more signs. Because I won't be there to hand them out.

anticipation

2004-12-08T14:42:00.000-08:00

Okay, so is it wrong that I want one of those buddy/pal thingies that is like a palm pilot but connects you to the internet SOLEY so that I can go browse the internet while on the pooper?

Apparently yesterday was just one of those days where everything that happens affects you to the subconscious point where you'll be dreaming about it all night. Nothing big or bad or great happened. I don't know if it's a state of mind I get in or what, but it happens every month just about the time I go postal. Doesn't matter what I do in the day, I dream about it.

So I had a dream last night that I was making buttons with a button making machine and it got taken away before I could think of anything cool to make. Well I got pissed and ran out there (out where? I don't know but I do, therefore it was "out there" ) screaming, but couldn't find the culprit (Little R).

Then I was outside and this HUGE lady with a red wig was yelling at me to get off the pedestal because Billie Jean was playing in the background (incidentally the song is what reminded me of this whole dream) and she said it was because I was standing there. I was mad at her because I KNEW that it wasn't my fault. So I got off and sure enough the music was still playing. So we started yelling at God (which is funny because I'm more agnostic than anything) to "please stop the bad man's music."

Okay. Not done.

I also dreamed of work and answering phones for the travel agents who had moved to the other side of the building (because we're expanding in RL) even though it technically wasn't ready. In fact, it still looked like it does now. Like a construction zone.

I wasn't the actually receptionist anymore, I was the office manager, but I was doing her job which I guess made it still sort of mine. I was running around frenetic like. And the receptionist next door came out of the bathroom and was telling me some rumor that was about me. It was an insult but also a complement.

I just don't remember what she said.

The damned phone calls kept waking me up (in RL) and when they finally stopped (in the dream) a large rabbit with a rat's face started chasing me. When I got away it was to smoke a cigarette which was made of candy. I don't smoke. I dumped it in this water bottle, or so I thought. When I looked down there was a fucking huge toad sitting there with a mouth the size of a punch bowl. I got really scared and he started chasing me.

When I turned around there was this pair of scissors chasing me instead and they were bigger than a car.

I woke up to my dog's jowls on my face.

journals, writing and the big fake O

2004-12-08T13:32:00.000-08:00

Yeah, so empty notebooks and fresh pens and unique journals are for some reason things that catch my fancy. Rough pages, odd covers, places for pictures to be pasted and all that jazz.

I suppose it's the undiscovered journey of the blank pages, the possibility, the future inspiration that would incite one to fill those pages, the longing for future words penned in haste, anger, passion, anything.

It's also something inside me that desires that flow, that 'writer's high' where you're inside the words, the world, the characters. I love it and I live there. The only truth I live with is the truth I write. (Anyone can catch that, surely, when they realize that most all writers write is lies and I am one of them).

I still don't know why anytime I am caught looking at journals at work I react as if I have been looking at porn. No big naked body parts or woman in the throes of fake orgasm on screen and yet I get all jittery and stutter my words.

the mojo in my jojo

2004-12-08T10:09:00.000-08:00

If I were a villain I would definitely be Mojo Jojo. At least he was the coolest option. There are still some awesome people out there that I could be.

I could be Donald Sutherland. He's not really a villian or anything, but he's still a cool choice.

Now I know that when I show up to an office party as a wallflower, all I need to do the be the single happiest sap there is incite arguments between all the married fools.

When I finally got it, I didn't wanna let it go. Nope.

http://bbspot.com/

alazka, knew yorki & poop

2004-12-05T23:58:00.000-08:00

Random Profile:

female

Fairbanks : Alaska : United States

32 recent posts (1562 total)

Interests: ...meeting new people...

First of all, not going to make the obvious comment about time and number posts and having too little else to do where she lives.

"Alaska. Meeting new people." Isn't that like saying 'I live in New York City. I hate strangers.'

Maybe I'm just not knowledgable enough on Alaska. Hmmm... Something new to say I'll study and then be distracted by something shiny. Like tinsel. Which, by the way, they should re-advertise as Pet Poop Decoration instead of something for the dead tree in your living room. As long as you're decorating waste...

semi colon chemicals and other malfunctions of the human body

2004-12-05T20:07:00.000-08:00

I baked chocolate chip cookies by myself today. Practicing for when I end up giving them out for the culmination of the Season of Greed and Grouch and oh, yeah Giving. Did a damn good job if I might say so myself. After the third batch I learned how to make them into shapes/textures that could be classified in sections other than "floppy cookie goop". If cookies have sections in which to be classified.

Anyway, now I feel accomplished. I think the world will be okay now.

Random thoughts of the day:

*Little R: "Now, Becca, I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but blahblah about the highlighters and blahblah about the white out and blahblah about the blue & black pens."

MyThoughts: OCD can be debilitating. If only we were that lucky.

*Lesson Learned: Having a good sense of humor is a GREAT thing. It's even better when you use it.

*Finding cups of water everywhere today. What could THIS mean? Either I am imagining things or someone with Alzheimer's is very thirsty.

*Walking Talking Slime now works here. Interesting to find that though it has no actual spine it can stand up straight.