Wow. This is adorable :)

a sad, sad world

What is it about money that makes people think that when they have a lot of it they're better than those without? Because they can afford to buy expensive things and because of those expensive things, shiney-on-the-outside-but-empty-on-the-inside people begin to pay attention to them? They become friends that are more expensive than the most priceless work of art because they take not green papers, not gold or diamonds but things that are beyond value. Like breath or the sense to enjoy it.

They take first your personality. They make you a carbon copy of something as nasty as cigarette smoke and old, blanched paper and a grey sky that enver ends.

Then they block off your heart from the rest of your body. With it locked away they take the capacity to feel emotions such as love, anger, humility.

Without your heart and personality you have no foundation on which to rest morals and ethics, so you have no opinions other than the ones they feed you.

With all this done they have stolen your soul and therefore your connection to other human beings.

So go ahead with your yachts and your Maseratis and your tiny dogs with crystal collars and the constant vague question that you might throw out there about why you must have it all. But then again, *they* have everything and you are one of *them* so you must have it all as well.

Go ahead with all the money in the world. Your condescension towards me is ironic, for what you see as substance I see as an empty cave for an empty shell to rattle around in until it's time to crack, produce nothing and feed the Earth your brittle remains so that it may make beautiful things from a life so void of such.

Fuck you in a tie (heavy curses abound)!

[angry post]

This is to all the ignorant asses out there that think a woman wearing a tie has to 'mean' something.

Fuck you once. Fuck you twice.

I don't know which one says 'fuck you!' more, so pick the one that pisses you off the most.

Even Mrs OCD. "But what does it 'mean'?"

How about it means I like wearing ties because it's a neat and distinguished look that not just guys should have.

And fuck you for assuming that I'm "a dike" and DOUBLE-FUCK YOU for thinking being gay is a bad thing and thinking all lesbians are "bulldikes" and fuck you for being anti-bulldikes. Just fuck you up a wall with a chainsaw. Suck on that, Mr. Anger Management.

You cannot assume something about a person because of something they are wearing, be it *anything*. Goths do not necessarily drown babies and spill goats blood, people in Metallica t-shirts are not necessarily angry people that want to 'Kill Em All', people from Wisconsin do not necessarily like cheese, and women in ties do not necessarily have penis envy.

How about while you're staring at me and thinking I like to have sex with women I'm staring at your nose and thinking you *LOVE* to drink yourself in to a stupor every night. Because I ain't got a sticker on my shirt that says 'I like eating bush' but you sure got a sign on your fucking nose saying 'I'm an alchy, world!'

Stop assuming. Talk to people. Learn about them. Stop being such fuck-cunts.

[/angry post]

fortune cookie #1

"Cold feet are warm in the sunlight."

'eghad, i did it again' or 'another poem'

Another one.


Practiced Saint

I see you smile; hands shake yours
i don't want this, cringing inside
to let you know how i truly feel
would slice your ego in three

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

i me see the inside you
the part you try to hide
i might do the unproud things
but at least my curtains are sheered

the little red bump
lets you know where i've been
and the white skirt tents
it's sequins are condemed

does that mean it's right to joke
does that make it okay to hate
to jeer and point and stab and scream
it's just another inside you like

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

the paperclips are missing
my stapler's gone too
are you trying to put it together now
you need all the help you can get

i'm stablized
in a world of rocking motions
your ignorant eyes
glint with st elmo's fire

i won't bow to the conformists
i won't smile because your back
you're another practiced saint
that i don't need to see

i'll let you see my anger
all my lack of hate
you're not the worst out there
your just the worst inside

notes from the workplace

Babies
Her clothes frighten me. Like those of Christina Applegate, but older and tackier and maybe not the clothes of Christina Applegate herself but the babies of Christina Applegate's clothes and a muumuu.

The Importance of a Greeting
Black, hard, beady little eyes stare at me, drill holes into the back of my neck. He's either on crack or just didn't take his allergy medicine this morning because he's wirey, frenetic, irritable and his eyes are passed bloodshot. Next time I'll say 'good morning' before I ask him a question.

Never take two Cool Mint Icebreakers at once
Breath fresheners should lighten and brighten your breath. They should not numb your tongue, mouth and throat. I wanted a mint, not chloraseptic.

Typos
(See if you can spot it)
War Memorial Auditorium
8000+ Business Execs
40+ Caterers
300+ Exhibitionists
(time for a new copy editor)

Snowbird
Her hair is a dull orange with the shine and curl of a clown's wig. Her Florida address (she can't be bothered to remember it) is written on the inside of her purse in big, bold letters. Neighboring this information is her phone number and "the password I always use for everything".

Need I comment? Really?

brought to you by the letter...

Seasame Street is their drug lab/whorehouse and sometimes I think they are trying to kill me.

The letter "e" with his endearing smile.

The capitalized "A" with her snear and razor-sharp head.

The way a "z" zigs out of the way just in time.

A the "j"s smirk drop.

They'll stab you right in the back they will. And don't get me started on "Q" and it's incognito lower case.

The ones with the polka dots and the stripes... The ones that think they're animals.... The ones that watch you with creepy little eyes...

I shudder with fear that I will never sleep again.